IN LOVE

 I think of him a lots lately because I am so into him without he knowing.. I fall in love with him so deeply day by day, he may not look sweet or romantic but I can feel his love for me and it makes me love him. How do I feel that day? That day was a wonderful day,, the day we facetime each other for the first time ever,, I feel suprised at first cuz he looks so fine and wondering if I deserve it when I look like kinda worst... Of course I'm afraid of his reaction a lots,, I gave him a picture of me that have a make up and filter only.. He may be suprised too.. because seeing my natural face.. But knowing that he was okay with whatever I be, make me feel grateful againn,, I should screenshot of him many times but I am too busy to insecure about my face, I'm so stupid righttt? 

But.. I watch the screenshot many times and smile like crazy many times.. I must be crazy right? I realize now,, how much I may fall in love deeply with this person in another day.. I actually never ever being this insecure and I am usually confident with myself but maybe I am overthinking a lots,, it should not be a big deal actually.. right? Since that day, I have been thinking of him... Thinking if someone like me are suitable for him.. Do I deserve him? I'm soo afraid I may hurt him without me knowing... I don't want to hurt him.. He may looks like okay but sometimes he feel not okay,, I can feel that sometimes eventhough he didn't show it.. 

I just want him to know how much he means to me,, How much I love him... Eventhough I don't show it, but I'm obsses with him.. he is my new obssesion.. I shouldn't be afraid right? sometimes I just hate how I look infront of him... hmmm.. I think I should do something..